>>380889I should qualify this though that at the time, I was over trying to learn anything and was already suicidal. I was long past caring that I was being denied a place in the world. I just wanted it to be over, knowing that there is no hope and there is no end, and the best I can ever have is some small happiness in private, away from people and society, the beast of screaming eugenics that permeated the air and the land and the sea. There is no happiness except the small shred that could be found alone, and I have not changed in that view to this day. Fixing society would only mean that the most egregious elements are kept at bay, because keeping eugenics will mean nothing but ruin for everyone. That's the best that can be hoped for. The thought that the state, an instrument of class rule, could be any path to the good, is laughable to the experience of the vast majority of humanity. So is this infantile belief in "natural social order" which tells us people are intrinsically collective (and thus they must, somehow, obey a clear hierarchical authority commanding the people like the nerve endings of a body, the corporatist view which is taken for granted by far too many).
That said, the information was out there, and I still had enough curiosity to ask what all this science meant, even at that time. But I sure as hell wasn't learning it at school, or through any of the authorities. We live in a fascist country, in a fascist planet and a fascist society. All other forms of thought have become completely inadmissible in the social sphere. It is only now that the formal political system is matching what has been a reality for the past several decades, that has been pushed very aggressively and has a larger (but not majoritarian) base that is consciously elevated and empowered for the fascist, eugenicist creed. In the long term, the fascists want to make scientific information completely inaccessible, and put an end to what little scientific knowledge does grow. "Science" as a useful method is anathema to the values of eugenist society. There is only "The Science", and the use of that terminology is a deliberate assault on the scientific method as something accessible to any rational person. Those considered "super-rational", above the general populace who are deemed retarded (and they consider anyone who isn't one of them retarded, just look at how much they shit on normal people), have the same interest in defending this madness as those who were invested in any other slavery. They utter their filth not out of zealous belief, but with a shit-eating grin. They KNOW exactly what they are doing and brag about it. The sadism is central to this eugenicist nightmare world, and sadism is promoted to the highest of virtues, one promoted in mass entertainment. The futility of any decency is emphasized over and over again.
Anyway, even if schools had any interest in teaching anything - and I get the sense that they're disappointed that the intellectual rot is affecting their research slaves and their ability to develop new weapons - the influence of eugenic rule and its incentives promotes retardation. It demands science be made proprietary and the domain of an elite few. And when you do look at science, its institutions are obsessive about control and eliminating any barrier between the master's will and all the natural objects of the world. It never was about some pursuit of "pure knowledge". Science does offer us a means to accumulate knowledge of the natural world, but like any intellectual production, the institutions of science are essentially religious institutions. The popularization of science was only part intended to allow some democratization of knowledge, and this has been replaced steadily with dogmatic science, where people are lumps of flesh to be processed and worked on by the will of the philosopher-kings. That's where you get this moronic positivist drivel about quantum mechanics saying anything about metaphysics.